96| QUICK time management tip that will blow your mind!

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Hey, welcome back to the Prosperity With Purpose podcast! I'm Jessica Hefley. We have a quick time management episode for you today. It's one of the biggest topics that I get requests on talking about that's why we spend multiple weeks within the Prosperity With Purpose Mentorship on this very topic in great detail. I am really taking it from the angle of your thoughts, making powerful decisions, but also taking actual inventory of your time where you're spending it, Y’all know how to manage your time. The problem isn't that you don't know how to do it. The problem is why are you not doing it ,and we really get to helping you do it from a place of purpose and stewardship - which I'm going to give you a little taste of today on this quick time management tip when you hear this word.

How does it change everything about how you spend your time “I'm on assignment” ? That changes everything! “I'm on assignment”. What if you viewed how you spend your time as if you are on assignment? God is the owner of everything. You are just the manager. You are just called to steward the gifts, talents, and time that he has given you, and so if you are on assignment that one thought, that one practice can drastically affect how you spend your time. How and why and what you prioritize your time on because if you're just living your life doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, doing, for everybody for all things. All things. There's no “You're an assignment.” and so when “You're on assignment” when you are called to steward and multiply your business. When you are called to steward your family - those most important things in your life when you're on assignment, when some other things come in come along. It's so much easier to say no to because you're remembering that you're saying yes to your assignment. What you are called to do? What you are called to steward and multiply? I was looking up the definition of stewardship and it's a person who looks after or manages someone; who is responsible to take care of something. Okay, so again if God owns everything and you're simply the manager, I'm simply the manager. God is the owner, we are the managers. It's not ours. Time is not even ours. It is his, and so I want to be incredibly intentional. You are a person of purpose who lives on purpose is a theme in my life. What I live I try to live into every day because when I but when I remember. But I am a person of purpose who lives on purpose that affects how I spend my time, that affects where I spend my time, that will affect you and how you spend your time. So just this very, very simple, very quick episode. We don't have to make this long today. We go way more in depth on this topic inside of Prosperity With Purpose Mentorship, but today I'm on assignment. You woke up every morning thinking I'm on assignment better. Yeah let's go the night before and you're looking at your planner the night before planning out your day the next day - being super intentional with your time off, your rest time, your work time. Not just your work time. But exactly what you're going to do with your work time? That’s a whole other 10 x episode and but if you were to look at tomorrow- I'm on assignment. God, how can I steward my time? Well how can I steward the gifts, talents, responsibilities, my business, my income? How can I steward that well that will change and that will affect what you decide to do and we even spend at least a week even more on the coaching sessions on hiring and delegating and thinking about this place of your zone of genius, and you operating in that place and that special calling that only you can do nobody else in this world can do what only you can do and how we've got to delegate and hire out the other things that are getting in the way of you truly stewarding your time at a level that will multiply and help more people. Faster, truly simple, amazing way to live help you prioritize! Let me know on this simple concept, “I'm on assignment”, how that affects, how that changes your day to-day work, your day-to- day home and how that affects what you say yes and what you say no to. Blessings to you guys on that. You're on assignment…I take that seriously.

94| Trading in PRIDE for HUMBLE PIE.

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Hello welcome back to the Prosperity With Purpose Podcast. I am Jessica Hefley, and today we're serving up some humble pie because who doesn't want that instead of pride is before the fall? I’d rather eat humble pie instead of fall and so I want humility to in today's episode. It is one of the core when I started my coaching program a couple years ago it used to be called Leading Ladies now it's called Prosperity With Purpose. It can evolve. It can change. You can do whatever you want, you're the business owner! I just felt like this was clearer and more fitting to the purpose and long term mission of what we are about. I did core values, and humility was one of the core values that I still want to live into. I still want to highlight. I still think is important and but kind of the preface humility was she is tender talking in terms of my clients talking in terms of the of the women that I serve. And my ideal client right? She is tender. Heart humility is she is tenderhearted in her childlike faith towards God's loving kindness that leads to repentance and is willing to learn a new thing so really king in there on. Open towards repentance open towards his loving kindness that leads to change and also open to learning a new thing so I'm going to cover 5 quick areas of why humility is so important in your business and in your life and I want this to be on the forefront of my mind on the forefront of my actions. And so I want to help and spread that message to you and impart that to you because it is so important. It is such a differentiating factor in how we lead because we are Christ's followers and humility is an important part of that and how and we demonstrate that and our work and our relationships how we model that. And so here's the 5. Number one, around humility because I long to be I want to be humble. It's not our natural tendency to be humble. But I know that to be more Christ-like I want to be more humble, so that is what feeds my desire to do this. Ok, so but number 1 humility will require you to be a beginner. Are you willing to learn a new thing? You're a rookie at leading your business in 2024 You're a rookie. You have never done this before. Are you willing in this day and age in this day of social media and this day of technology and this day of culture. You've never done it before you may have done a lot of things for 1,2,3,4,5,10 years but in the past, but you've never done it in this present day and age so you have to embrace. With humility being a beginner trying new things different ways to work our business different ways to think different ways to act and be and be willing if what we have been doing in the past that used to work is it anymore. Be willing to be a beginner!

Number 2- be open to the possibility that you are wrong. A big piece of humility is being open to the possibility that you could be wrong, not being so right? That's what pride the opposite of humility is pride and pride is like, I am right. I am doing this, right?I'm up here. You can't tell me what to do like it's this haughtiness that there's a difference between confidence and and haughtiness. Confidence is a good thing. Haughtiness is like this, I don't know this posture, this energy, this presence. I'm better than you I can't be wrong. But I am positive that there's no other way to look at this no other options and and but also a part of humility is so many people that's one side of it. As part is being open to the possibility of being wrong. But also when you are going back to number 1 being a beginner trying new things put yourself out there. You will make mistakes. It will not be perfect and so a part of the human experience is being willing to make a mistake. Being willing to do it wrong. Being willing the reason we are not perfect is why we we need a Savior. Okay because we can't do it perfect, we're not going to never hurt anybody's feelings or never do anything wrong that doesn't mean that we shouldn't do anything! Embrace that you're human. Embrace that you will make mistakes. Embrace that you have a Savior who is perfect, so you do not have to be. But be open to the possibility of being wrong or doing something wrong. Okay, Number 3 - Be the first to apologize. In taking a space of humility and eating that good old humble pie and just being a wholehearted roundabout person is just wise to be the first to apologize. Don't sit there and wait to be justified, wait for somebody to take your side, wait for somebody to understand you, wait for “but you don't understand what they did..” right to be the first to apologize, be the first to forgive. That will give you way more power over the situation over the other person. All those things be the first we can consider being the first to apologize. Number 4- How can you consider another a big part of humility, “Humility isn't thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less.” which goes to my point. How can you consider another? So humility isn't thinking of yourself like thinking less of yourself. It isn't putting yourself down, thinking that you're less than and thinking that you're not good up. That's not humility. It's simply just thinking of yourself less. And thinking of other people more. It's not never considering yourself. It's just being..it's just a posture of thinking of other people. The posture of humility, pride is like “No this is what I want!” “This is what I need.” “This is the way it should go!” “This is the only way it should be.” and humility is like “Okay oh how can we consider this other part? This person's opinion? This person's point of view? This person's perspective? It's considering them. It's not thinking of yourself less. It's just thinking of yourself a little bit less in quantity of time so you can say think about others more. Number 5- You may not know at all a way to experience humility - a way to live out humility is having the posture and the thought that you may not know it all. You may not have all of the information. This has been incredibly helpful for me. From someone who used to be incredibly judgmental and think that her way was the best way. It was the only way to do it. I thought of it. It has to be the best. Why is anybody else thinking about this, you have to understand that people make decisions in their life and business without you knowing all of the information, so you can ask curious questions to try to understand. But I often now take the posture when someone does something that I don't think is a good idea or that's something I wouldn't want to do, I don't go about and saying that's the stupidest idea ever, I can't believe I did that can you believe I did that?" I now take the posture of “Interesting, that's interesting.” and then if I want to learn, just even pausing and saying that's interesting because it allows the space of I may not know all the information there. There probably is something else to the story that I am not keen to. I did not know as to why they did that as to why they made that decision and I'm open to the possibility. There could be more to the story. There could be more information and if it is that important then I should ask curious questions never make assumptions another really big piece of humility is. I heard this in a bill Johnson Sermon a long time ago and it really struck out with me is “We cannot Judge. people's assumptions.” So it's so easy for us to be like, “Well they did this because a dot da da da da or I know that they're dealing with it and that's why they did that we cannot judge someone. We do not know why somebody did that something that they did. We do not know why somebody said something to us even if it was hurtful or painful or whatever, or why they made the choices that they make we cannot make it. It is not wise to make assumptions of others and that is something between them and the Lord and again, that's where you can ask questions to learn more conversations but you may not know it all. So quickly I just wanted I just feel like how humility is important, and I wanted to put on the forefront of my mind. I've really tried to there’s multiple opportunities for me to speak up for myself or say something mean about somebody or defend myself or try to over-explain. Over-explaining yourself as a trauma response, by the way, like you feel like you have you're not saying enough because you're so terrified that you will be misunderstood. You will be misjudged. You'll be mis-perceived and the Lord has just really invited me this week and some on some occasions where I have been misunderstood or misperceived by others to really take it before the Lord like let him fight my battles let him be my defender. Let the fruit of my life speak for itself and may I encourage you in that as well when you may often feel like you want to get defensive or prove your point or overexplain your area, so other people will believe you or trust you or be on your side or whatever, like humility is like I just keep doing what the Lord has called you to do. And the fruit of your life will speak for itself. That's a stance, that's a place that's a posture that's and and it's a place of like trust it's a place of intimacy with the Lord. It's a place of allowing him to be your defender. It's a place of and working out your ish with him instead of talking to everybody gossiping or talking to everybody else about it or trying to get other people on your side. It's has been a true area of growth for me for sure and don't we all want more areas of growth? I mean we don't always want them right, but we want what the areas of growth will produce in us. They produce character. They produce endurance. They produce fruit, and the fruit of your life will speak for itself. So I'm proud of you guys, proud of you guys who are really, really wanting to grow in the area of humility in all areas of your life and business. And who knows maybe I'll do who knows who maybe I'll do an episode of all of my values but let me tell you them real quick while they're on the forefront of my mind kind of the core values of my business behind the scenes are Growth, Awareness, Stewardship, Transformation, Humility, Honor and Wholeness. So let me go ahead and read these explanations. I think it's so important and for what you do like your core but we have a core values as a family, and I also have a core values of my business because those are what I want to operate out of what I want to teach about what I want to embody. What do I want to be an example of and what I believe at leading lady. What I believe somebody who prospers with purpose. Entails so growth. So if these resonate with you I would love to explore that more I would love to partner with you inside of Prosperity With Purpose Mentorship because these are the core values that I believe in a woman that is a business owner that will change the world that embeds true prosperity with purpose growth. She is called to multiply her impact personally and professionally and leaves a legacy that impacts eternity. Number 2 Awareness- she is committed to the most important work of taking her thoughts captive and is self-aware curious and compassionate about those thoughts toward herself and others. Stewardship- she identifies her purpose and takes ownership and accountability of her partnership with the Holy Spirit and authority in Christ in her calling transformation. She has hope her future will be different from her past and she believes in the possibilities of change for the better. A renewed mind equals a transformed life. Humility - she is tenderhearted in her childlike faith towards God's loving kindness that leads to repentance and she is willing to learn a new thing. Honor- she honors her time boundaries and commitments to herself and others. Through nourishing routines that feed her soul from a place of rest and wholeness she prospers as she casts off old entanglements and runs freely in abundance spiritually emotionally physically and financially as she empowers others to do the same. Wholeness is a natural outpouring of who she is and how she leads and as I reread the humility one , I just wanted to touch on 1 more thing real quick because it is key. We cannot rush over the part of repentance. I'm going to read the definition. Well my core value of humility again. She is tenderhearted in her childlike faith towards God's loving kindness that leads to repentance and is willing to learn a new thing his loving kindness leads to repentance part of humility is repenting. When you notice something that you have done notice something that you have thought notice the way that you have lived is repenting that before the Lord and confessing that to anybody else that that that that has affected but there is ah a key to freedom and repentance so may. We don't live our life in denial. We don't live our life not taking ownership of our choices. We live a life of repentance because we know that when we repent we can turn from another way. It is it is a representation of humility. We're turning away from that old way going a new way which is also why taking your thoughts captive and thinking. Specific thoughts on purpose is so important because that will lead you to a life of of repentance that will lead you to a life of humility and not pride and like we said I'd rather have humble pie than pride before the fall! Amen. Amen. So these things are important. in your business and in your life and I'm so proud of you for living them out. See you next time.

93| Want To Free Up More Mental Space? It's SPRING CLEANING time, let's get organized!

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Welcome back to the Prosperity with Purpose Podcast I'm Jessica Hefley and we are doing a little spring cleaning around here. You may think that your cluttered house or your this and that and that has nothing to do with your business, but it does because clutter equals unmade decisions. This is what is happening inside of your head. It is what is happening inside of your body, and it is what is happening all around yo’ house. So we're going to do a quick episode how to spring cleaning. You're gonna do like note your tangible house like tangible things around your house. We're going to help you make decisions because you are capable of making decisions, so your life can move forward. That was a transformational anchor thought for me. As a recovering perfectionist I got coaching years and years ago on this and she helped me have this tremendous breakthrough that decisions were so hard for me because I was so scared that I was going to make the wrong decision. So pick picking out paint colors was debilitating… debilitating! What if I pick the wrong one? What if I don't like it? It all of that came down to this - you are capable! I am capable of making a decision, so life can move forward. You can change your mind later but you got to make some decisions so life can move forward, so life can go can move and not stay stagnant and stuck. Four areas I'm going to challenge you and you're actual living space this week because this does have to do with your mental health. This does have to do with your mental, emotional health. This does have to do with your spiritual health - you doing these things. Choosing not to have clutter in these areas will mean will mean that you made a decision which will also free up so much mental space but give you the agency and the courage then to also make decisions in your business. To not freeze at indecision, to not freeze at imperfection, to not freeze and you don't know you don't know what to do now. You know exactly what to do! You know exactly what to do! Just do it and if you make a mistake or it's not as good as you wish then you can fix it later, but you got to do something so life can move forward. You are capable of making decisions to create peace for your life and that's what we're about round here . To create more peace so you can make more money. That's what the Prosperity with Purpose Mentorship is about that's what our basic intro Mini-course How To Get Off The Hot Mess Express for ninety seven bucks. That's what it is for to help you start to unclutter your life. To help you to make decisions because you are capable of making decisions to move. The 4 areas - here you go 1) The space you've been avoiding the most! That's your first space you're going to declutter over spring break over spring cleaning or whatever you all got one. Everybody got one. It's an area. It's a room. It's a closet. It's a drawer. It's you just stuff stuff in there for forever. Here we go here is where we're starting the place that you have been avoiding the most that is what you were going to declutter and clean first. That's the one we do. One of my one of my biggest and best pieces of advice is do the thing you're avoiding the most first - get it out of the way. Get it done! Everything after that will seem easier. Everything after that will be easier and it will be less work. Do the thing that you are avoiding the most first that's a word. Number 2 I want you to clean your desk or office space. This is something that I'm doing over spring break. We're in a new home. But I for somehow forgot to do my office like it's just plain and I wanted a really pretty black ground if you're watching me on YouTube lI'm in my closet because I have this window here and I kind of like a little mini-desk but also in my office I want to have a beautiful background I want that space to be a space that I love to be, and that I can quickly utilize that I can turn my video camera on and make a video and everything is ready to go so your desk office space create a space for you and there's still like shame for six first six months of my business I work my business on my kitchen table. That's fine with me. But if it but get some organization get some pins get a stapler get your plugins that you need get a some of y'all need to get some buy a printer some of y'all need to go today and actually buy a printer or go buy ink for that printer. Okay, a business owner has a utilizing working printer. What are those areas that just it's like been annoying and you just have been putting off what can you do to make your office area your office work your office space more user, friendly with less resistance. Do you need to buy some sticky notes.? Do you need to actually clean off the top of your desk? Need to buy some new extra notepads and do you need to organize your bills? What is it about that space? How can you make - this is in the book Atomic Habit it's like how can you create the least resistance for the things that you need to do most? Okay, so make it prettier. Maybe you need to do something pretty. And there but a pretty background, paint it I don't know but make your office work space uncluttered and easy to access. Something that you enjoy. A place that you want to go to often and a place that when you go there to work everything that you need to work is there. Okay. Pretty easy. Number 3 your clothes. We actually have foregone a big spring break trip this year actually, had a really amazing trip planned our friend invited us on, but it got canceled. That's another story, so we were sad. Because we had huge big plans and then we didn't have any plans and then we just that was an invitation for us to just to evaluate this is a season. My husband just got back from a long men's retreat and there's lots of things going on at his work and honestly since we moved in our house about four or five months ago there still are some things that we just need to get done. I'm taking my own advice here like there's some things we need to get done around the house to help us feel more at home. I want to do some things in my office. He wants to clean his office. We've been throwing everything in the third garage. That's my number 1 thing is the space. We've been avoiding the most is our third garage. Yeah, but just like I've threw all my Christmas stuff in there. We still have stuff that. Everything that we didn't find its permanent place when we moved in as in the third garage and our third garage kind of opens up to our pool area. It has 2 doors you can like you can park a car in there if you want to or you can open it from the other side and we can use it as like when we have large parties we could put seating at table and and seating in there. We'll put our floaties and pool supplies and stuff in there. So anyways, it accesses to the back part of our yard to our pool and it's full a junk right now and we actually have like this really cool dolly our builder built this in where it's a dolly like one of those things you called dumb waiter, but it's huge and it can hold up to 300 pounds. It comes down from the ceiling. If you're watching me on YoutTube I'm doing our motions where you you're welcome. Um, it comes down from the ceiling you can pile boxes stuff up to 300 pounds of stuff on it and then it goes up into the attic and so you don't have to carry all the heavy stuff up the stairs. So it’s actually really amazing and so we actually just need to utilize it and put a ton of stuff up in the attic which will take me and Rob to both be there at the same time someone loading it someone up in the attic unloading it. We're going to do that this next week because that's the biggest area that we have been avoiding. But also what I'm going to do this week, number three was clothes. This is what I want you to do because I was you can see some of my clothes you get it inside scoop if you're watching on Youtube. Clothes, clothes that can be 1 of the biggest areas of clutter of unmade decisions. How many of you have a closet full of clothes but you go in and you're like oh I can't find anything to wear! I'm tired of saying that because I do have things to wear or if I keep saying I don't have anything to wear. It is time to release it. Go watch some KonMari videos. What is the Magic Art of Tidying Up. What is her tidying book? It seems silly. She like thinks and thinks things for bringing them joy and then gets rid of them if it doesn't bring you joy anymore. Get rid of it. There is freedom. There is more so brain space when you declutter when you make powerful decisions to release something to get rid of something and so I'm going to be going through my clothes. Because I don't like when I come in and I'm like I don't know what to wear I don't know what to work when I'm literally like touching 20 different things I'm going to maybe you just need to organize like give your ah ah and great thing to do is find 5 to 10 outfits that you love that you love because here's also what happens. And I tend to like not wear the clothes that I love because I'm like saving them from special occasions where are the clothes you love wear are the clothes that make you feel good. Okay, so get together like 10 shirts 10 outfits that you love just rotate those. You feel confident in those, they fit good. Get rid of the stuff that just doesn't fit good. Get rid of the stuff that you got to keep pulling and tugging on and that just like doesn't you just like are like oh I don't even like this doesn't even feel good. Why do you keep wearing it? You don't have to eat it. So anyways, this an invitation and this invitation for me to kind of get some. We're moving out the winter clothes bringing down the spring clothes, figuring out what really brings me joy and getting rid of some stuff or putting some stuff to the side that's uncluttering my mind out of the way. So I do have like I have another closet upstairs where I keep like my fun Plexus has provided a lot of like really fun opportunities. For things that I wouldn't have otherwise like I've got some formal dresses. I've got a lot of like dresses up when they take us to Hawaii every year just hawaiian dresses, beach dresses just some fun form other things I don't have down here cluttering my space down here. That's okay, like maybe you need to. Have some of those fun pieces that you really only wear once a year or on a special occasion. Maybe put those in another closet. Go put them in your guestroom closet if you have the space or figure something creative out or maybe get rid of them who knows but close is the third one and then the fourth area is I want you to pick one of the most frequently used. Bases that just it just just needs some attention you know like it's just gotten overwhelmed like maybe it's your silverware drawer like maybe you've just thrown junk in there and you're just like okay it's time I use this drawer all the time. What could I do to? What could this small thing that I could do to provide more peace for my life is just taking a pause and doing that and maybe it's the the top of your vanity like in the bathroom. Maybe it's just covered and hairspray and face washes and makeup and hair stuff and maybe you just pause and you take a moment. This is a space I see every single day. What can I do to get more organized some so really, really like silly thing that I did last month a couple months ago but I was just so proud of myself. Okay, so I had this makeup bag that was a gift it was a gift for my company and I had been using it for years. It was like the perfect size it held all my makeup stuff but it was hideous to me like it was so ugly. Like neon pink and neon purple and I was just like every time I used it I was like I love that this holds my makeup I love it. But it's ugly so I finally just got on Amazon and got me a beautiful new neutral makeup holder and ah and every time I see it now it brings me joy. That's another thing that she teaches you in that KonMari whoever she is. She's like if it doesn't spark joy for you get rid of it like it. It is okay for you to have things in your life that spark joy I went through a season once where I got rid of the socks that always went down when I wore them that drove me crazy. I just done got rid of them. Okay we keep to this is the example of like why do we? We have choices when life is so rushed, and we just keep wearing the same thing that drives us crazy or keep putting on the sock. that we know is going to go down and we're going to be pulling on it and tugging on it forever. We keep using this thing that is just so hideous to us like take a pause. What is something that you frequently use so often that you just need to replace? Are you just need to declutter or maybe you need to get a couple things from the store to help you organize that space or really what you need to do is probably just get rid of some Stuff. Don't get in this notice if you just keep buying organizational bins or baskets or things. To organize your crap when you just need to get rid of some stuff. So anyways, I'm excited for you for this invitation for you to spring clean those 4 areas again where the space you've been avoiding the most is number one get it out of the way number 2 is your desk office space have that be an inviting welcoming. Easy accessible place where it has everything that you need number 3 your clothes that is something that you will need to use every single day please wear Clothes. So do something about that to make that space lest make some decisions you are capable of making decisions to create peace for your life. You are capable of making decisions. So life can move forward and the number 4 is just a frequently used space something that you can do to that space to help you feel more peace feel more ease and ultimately doing all of this is going to help you feel more in control. Okay, that's why. That's with these these cluttered spaces. They feel out of control so they're creating back to the good old feelings wheel they're creating these feelings of chaos or avoidance or um, can I just say chaos again. Like it is which is the opposite of peace and so if you want to create. Maybe you clean out your car the trash in your car like just make the powerful decisions trying to snap into the microphone make powerful decisions that actually don't take very long. But you avoiding them creates more chaos in your life, so create some more peace for your life make powerful decisions. Clutter is nothing more than unmade decisions. Notice how that also is happening in your thoughts and your brains. But that's another episode. We got lots of them. So check the ones in the past check the ones in the future. Still continuing to get so much positive feedback about the 5 part money Mindset Series episode 85 through 89 check that out if you home on Spring break or going on a walk. But anyways here we go I'll let you go have fun decluttering. It's important you are capable of creating more peace for your life.

See you next time.

92| What are you resisting or avoiding? Why strategy isn’t the problem.

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Hey, welcome back to the Prosperity With Purpose Podcast I am Jessica Hefley and hopefully you listened to last week because we are going to touch on it a little bit with this good old feelings wheel it is going to help you when you coach your team or your employees or your line of business. What a strategy isn't the problem, actually a no strategy is not your problem. A strategy is important. But so many people are just seeking “Tell me what to do”. “Tell me how to do this.” “Give me the exact step by step”. I don't have to think of anything and I just do these things. Oh how I wish that was the answer but most people really do know what they need to do they know what they need to do in their business. They know what they need to do in their marriage, their parenting. They know what they need to do to for their health. They know for the most part, the things they need to do you know if you need to lose weight you need to exercise you need to track what you're eating. You need to get more water and need to get more of those things to grow in order to grow your business. You know the things you do you need to market. You need to sell yourself on social media. You need to be there. You know what you need to do and more than likely there is tons of resources training videos. All the things that I've already told you what to do 500 times. I'm more curious about why you're not doing it. You know the things you need to do for the most part and I am not a disser of strategy understand that strategy is important once you know why you're not doing it or more importantly. Know why you are have the vision for where you are going and why is it is important to do this in the first place like what is your self-concept as a leader what you live into the story. You tell yourself. So if you tell yourself I'm unsuccessful. This isn't going to work I've tried that before you make perfect sense that you just continue. To live into that story. It's not working. You've tried that before and it didn't work and you're not a leader. You keep it's like a self-fulfilling prophecy if your identity is “Oh well I'm not a healthy person”, or “I'm not like her”, or “I'm not as extreme as tha"t” or whatever you have to notice. There is something behind there of why you aren't doing it. So why I'm talking about this today? I always come and talk to you about my real life experiences. I have been doing a bunch of coaching calls on my Plexus team. So I've got some leaders I'm trying to help get backup to 3 stars and above, that can come to the mastermind with us and I know a lot of a lot of my listeners are network marketing professionals a lot of my listeners aren't, so this will pertain to both of you and how you can coach others to help them get the results they want so hang tight with me for a second but I was coaching them all. And I have them fill out this coaching call form before the call and I will link that at the bottom for you guys to help equip you with that I found years ago. I used to do a lot of coaching calls and it was just ended up me telling them what to do strategy, like okay you go do this, this, this, this and this that's what I thought. Ah, good leader was supposed to do and I I was successful. I had the track record. So I thought they just needed me to tell them what to do what ended up happening is we I wasted a lot of my time and I hate wasting my time. I wasted my time. I wasted their time. We'd have this great call, and then I wasn't seeing the results. They still weren't going and doing the things even though they had a clear strategy even though they knew the things they needed to do. They weren't doing it and so years later through my John Maxwell training and definitely through my Certified Christian Life Coach training I've learned to be a professional question asker, and that is my advice. Do you shut up and ask more questions? It helps them become aware. It helps them evaluate themselves. It helps them come up with the ideas. Nobody really likes being told what to do like if it's their idea. They're more likely to do it. They have ownership in it. They have empowerment in it. They they understand why they need to do it. It's not just somebody saying do this and and behind the scenes are kind of like I have no idea why she said to do this. This doesn't make any sense to me but she said no when you ask the right questions it reveals the the deeper things. So, I have a whole coaching call for them and I'll go through all of it with you but the most powerful question on the entire sheet is what are you avoiding or resisting if you if and you will you guys? are you. Want to you guys want to prosper you want you want to prosper with a purpose. You know your identity. You know your purpose and your listeners of this podcast you you listened to the old episodes you get it so you are going to allow yourself to ask this question. Most people won't. Because most people will just try to steam ahead with their life and business doing the things and it feels like they have their stinking foot on the break and it feels hard and it feels resistant and they're not resting and they're just hustling and then they burn out or they're lost that love and feeling when it comes to the work again because they lost the purpose behind it. They aren't in touch with their body and their feelings and what their thoughts are actually creating within their physical body holding up the feeling well for you YouTube watchers. Okay, so because if you will be honest about what you are avoiding or resisting I mean those are uncomfortable things. There's a reason you're not doing that live video. There's a reason you haven't been talking about the business more. There's a reason you haven't been creating community in your team. There's a reason whatever the thing is you're resisting, there's a reason, and let's get curious about it because that's what's going to give you the breakthrough not another strategy session not another waste of time for somebody and waste of time for yourself. Getting to be able to identify why you're not doing that that will help free. You? Okay so let's go over the questions on the coaching call. But again like they all did all these calls but what we spent the most time on and where people had the most Aha! moments. The most like oh my goodness I've never thought about it that way. Oh wow this is really going to make a difference is when we covered that question so you can just do that on yourself right now like if you're not doing coaching calls for other people. What personally in your area of work in your area that you have been called to what are you avoiding or resisting. Doing in that area that will actually create more peace for you if you get that over with or you have that conversation or you journal about why you're feeling that way or why you're feeling stuck because at the root of it, are you feeling embarrassed? Are you feeling insecure? are you feeling helpless? Are you feeling confused? Are you worried that you'll be rejected? You have fear of success? Do you have fear of what that would mean for you? What that would look like for you and do you feel insignificant? Would you feel weak if you did something and it didn't turn out? It was fascinating years, years, years, and years ago I took some of my top level leaders on a like retreat to California. We went to a conference. It was like a Christian leadership conference with worship and really great speakers. It was awesome and then we did something scary which is always my favorite thing to do is push my team, push my leaders because it's also pushing me. To do something they're terrified of because after somebody does something they are terrified of, they will walk ten feet taller, they'll act a little bulletproof and even though they may have been scared out of their ever loving mind, it gave them some courage, some bravery.What's this I just wrote this quote down last night. It was about courage. It was so helpful to me hold on. Let me find it here in my notes real quick and “Courage isn't the absence of fear, it's the ability to take action”. While experience experiencing fear so many things so people are like oh this feels terrified now courage is still doing the thing even though you feel terrified and so courage is huge anyways I had them do this trapeze like we had. It was a literal trapeze school. It was on the Santa Monica Pier you could see the ocean in the background. We had to go up like climb up this huge ladder. I told the story of 4 on a episode long time ago. But and we climbed up this ladder high to the very top of a platform where you then had to have this oh a sort of baton. It's a literal bar that you hold on and let and jump off the platform and just swing, freefall and there's only a net underneath you and you are up, up, up, up high. It's terrifying and so we did that and then we did it where somebody else was swinging like this is literal trapeze like you've seen it at a circus so somebody else starts swinging, a guy starts swinging by his knees so he's swinging by his knees and then they time it perfectly. They got a microphone and they tell you to jump off the platform. You swing a couple of times you dangle by your knees. You're dangling by your knees. He's dangling by his knees and the timing matches up where you grab arms and you let go and he just holds you. It's so wild and so terrifying and 1 of the coolest things in my life I've ever done. I don't know why I'm telling you this story. I think has to do with pray courage. Anyways, getting your people, getting yourself to do things that they are scared of is my favorite because I know the replications I know the lasting effects I know the memories that that entails but also what that does for their bravery and courage so doing trapeze lessons may be so unrelated to your current business. But it's not because it allowed them to feel the feelings of being scared and then choosing to do them anyways which is like basically everything you're going to do for the rest of your life. So but said that the first six months of your business is really just learning how to regulate your nervous system because you're doing something you're terrified to do, and I would agree that it doesn't stop at six months like you're constantly. We think that we master something we're like oh no I mastered fear or oh no I mastered we're gonna do episode on this I mastered the fear of me and I'm not people pleasing - isn't an issue for me. I've already mastered that. There's always an invitation for another layer of that. Okay I am getting off track but it's good. Okay there. We got coaching call. So let me go through the questions real quick on what? Okay what first of all why I do this is I think it's so important for somebody to take agency before my time with them before their time. You your time is valuable you you don't have to wait till you're as a high level up as me your time is valuable now and this teaches these teaches the people that you are coaching to hold themselves accountable. Okay, so here's the question I'm gonna tell you all the questions and then I'm gonna explain a little bit. Why I ask these questions. Okay and they have to fill this out before our call. At least 24 hours before our call so they have to be thinking about these things they have to be evaluating themselves. They have to be okay. So anyways, I asked them what book you're currently reading. What is your biggest strength as a leader. What are your daily, weekly, monthly tasks that you do for your ah business what are you avoiding or resisting what is your work routine like how many hours a day and a week do you work your business. What is your goal. Why have you not already reached that goal and then I have them do a goals exercise of where they want to be and a year from now. But then also working backwards if you want to be here a year from now where do you need to be in six months. three months. and one month and then at the end I have we filled this out during the call. What are the detailed action steps before our next call and the thoughts you need to practice on purpose. And then how will you feel once you've accomplished these things. Okay, so let me explain what this is very I say strike strategy is not important. This is actually very strategic. However, it's a beautiful balance of both. Okay I once was on a training call and afterwards someone was like I just wanted her to give me strategy and I was like that's so interesting because if that's your thought you're probably over there like she didn't give me strategy, so that makes her feel frustrated. Which then makes her think that she can't work her business or she can't be successful because somebody didn't give her strategy or her thought may have been well she didn't help me but it's not just she. Her thought probably is nobody can help me and when she thinks nobody can help me or she's thinking I can't even help myself. Nobody can help me. It's this feeling of hopelessness. It's this feeling of anger. It's this feeling of frustration and when she continues to believe nobody can help me. She can't help me nobody can help me, and then it just keeps creating “nobody can help me” and this stuckness, stuckness, stuckness. Isn't that fascinating? I go into every training I ever attend thinking I'm going to get out of this exactly what I need. I am going to get out of this training exactly what I need today and that. Opens me up I can learn anything I can learn something from a beginner. I can learn something from someone who's not in my profession I can learn something from anybody because everything in life is a lesson ,and when I think I I am going to get out of this exactly what I need the feelings that creates for me is anticipation excitement. Importance because I'm going to get out of this exactly what I need and you know what happens, then I end up getting out of this exactly what I need and I go put into practice something that I was open to allowing to learn that should be an entire podcast episode all itself. Okay, so here's why I ask these specific questions what book are you currently reading? I am actually going to change this before I give this to you guys because I did this last couple times and they would like just tell me a book they were reading at church or just like this fiction book and I was like I meant what book are you reading in line with your profession like what sales book are you reading what network marketing book are are you reading what leadership book are you reading? And something in line with your occupation. I I ask them this. I don't ask them are you reading a book circle yes or no. No, no, no, no I say what book are you reading because leaders are readers foundationally leaders are readers. If they're not reading a book before they fill this format. They'll go pick up a book, read one page and come back and tell me they're currently reading such and such book. Okay I want to rise them up. Empower them to do the and the activities that will get them the the results that need so. I'm not asking them yes or no questions. Please stop asking your people yes or no questions. Ask them open ended questions. Rise them up to be a leader. A literally tangible example in my network marketing business is I don't say like oh Are you signed up to go to our company convention? I don't say that because that's a yes or no question. I say who’s coming?I don't even ask if they're coming I say “Who do you have from your team that's coming with you to convention?” That's how I ask the question because I'm already assuming that they're signed up because they're they're leader in the business. They should absolutely be going but they should not only just be going. They should be rising up other people on their team to go. That's a word for somebody. Okay, next question what is your biggest strength as a leader I want them to focus on their strengths. I want to know how them to be aware of and know why they're good at this. What makes them unique? What makes them good because again they may be looking at me or someone else and thinking well I'm not like I'm not good at this and this and this like she is or I'm not good in this area. I think they have this preconceived notion that you have to be successful or you have to be strong in certain things in order to be. No I want them to know and and I want to speak life into the things that they are good at. I think that's very important for you as a leader for you as you're coaching somebody else. You definitely want to praise them. You definitely want to recognize the ways that they are unique in their strengths. Okay, next what are your daily, weekly, monthly activities in your business. So I want them to be able to writing that out because people say all the time. Oh I work my business so much and I'm always like “Oh really? Okay, okay, so what exactly and when exactly are you working your business? That's another one of the questions you knowwhat how many hours a week day in a week are you working your business? I want them to actually evaluate it because you know people are like I drink so much water and I'm like oh really like how much you like oh two glasses. It's so much more fascinating so you get clearer on what that actually yes so get clearer clearer on what that. Actually means and this really is for them for them to see and then you can you can offer some it'll it'll provide you some insight to ask some questions on if they like have they work 1 hour a week and their goal is to like reach the top of the company in a year you can ask some because of the fact you said you wanted to be at the top of the company in a year do you think these activities will be enough to get you there. Okay, ask them the question put it back on to them I'm going to I'm getting and we talked about what are you avoiding or resisting. It's the money shot like if they will be still for a moment. To actually tell you what they're avoiding or resisting. It's almost always the reason their business isn't growing so I want to get to the root of it like let's get to the real reason your business is not growing one time I had a girl she and took her child out to like a mother's Stayout program. It was like 4 hours and she got she had she was kid free for 4 hours she went to the coffee shop and worked her business and she was like Jessica I had four uninterrupted hours to work my business and I got so much done! She said but I ran out of time before I was able to make some new reach outs for my business just left inside. Um. Because I was like what did you do for 4 hours? Isn't that funny like her brain was like oh I worked so hard and she filled 4 hours worth of things to do but she wasn't doing the 1 thing that would actually move the needle in her business. Actually grow her business in the present and in the future. So, so interesting. We really also have to evaluate and prioritize the things that need to be done during non work hours. Okay so what is your work routine like I want to hear are they filling in the nooks and crannies are they putting in specific work hours and separating those we would have some discussions about that. Um, what is your goal and why have you not already reached your goal? Yes, okay, so you not being like well here's why I think you haven't reached your goal. No ask them why they think they haven't reached their goal. This is one of the most valuable things you can do as a leader is pause yourself and yeah, there wasn't something wrong in the the podcast recording right? then I just paused for like literally only 5 seconds there is so much power in the pause because it's uncomfortable when you pause so you as a leader have to be able. And willing to feel the feeling of uncomfortable and let it be paused for a while. Let it be silent for a while. Also pro tip don't ever let them say I don't know I don't like if if in the question, why have they not I reachached their goal and they say I don't know why I haven't reached my goal already. Here is your opportunity to say. Okay, if you were to take a guess. Why do you Why do you think keep coming back to it. Don't let them say I don't know. Don't let that be the end all ok so keep being like ok huh like if you were just to take a guess. Why do you think you haven't reached your goal yet. This is so important so important do not answer this question for them. You can you can add some things to it after they answer the question but you would be doing them a tremendous disservice I am so about do not just give a man a fish teach a man. Fish teach them. How give them the feelings wheel like literally you can get the feelings without while you're doing a coaching call like what actually is the feeling that you're avoiding or resisting what is going on deeper. Why are you not already actual talk about some breakthroughs. You'll get some if you'll shut up and ask more questions! Okay, and then a goals exercise. This was really this was really important but this also I learned something new this last round which I'm going to tweak this before I give it to you? Okay, so people were giving me their goal again. This is network I was. Specifically this past week I was coaching people in their network marketing business I coach people in all professions. But for this one they were telling me where they wanted to be in a year six months three months and one month but they weren't they weren't aware of what they even needed to reach that one month goal. So some people were saying they wanted to hit a specific rank this month and when I I tried to ask on this before the call because I didn't want to waste time with this on the call I was like okay you said you wanted to be senior gold ruby whatever by the end of this month how many people do you need to add to your organization in order for you to hit that goal this month and it was so interesting. How many people did not know that number. So I made sure they knew how to do that math before I got on a coaching call with them because we got lots of other things to talk about in the coaching.I don't have time to figure out basic math with them. So this also helps them learn how their compensation plan works or help if you're in a sales industry help them make sure they know how. To reach the goal that they want to reach don't just let them say okay, here's my goal isn't that fun I hope I get it. No they need to know specifically what it will take for for them to reach that goal. You cannot win the game if you do not know the rules so make sure that is incredibly clear for them they can work with numbers. They can't work with oh help a catch it I have no idea how many people I need to even get it now help them to know what that means so then at the end of the coaching call have a detailed action steps for them to take just a couple of steps so they can feel like they are winning. They are going in the right direction but also a very specific thought for them to practice on purpose which will create the feelings that they long to feel in their business. Okay, so if they're in this. They're in a shame season or a fear season or whatever help them have an anchor thought that makes them feel the feelings of empowered or powerful or proud or hopeful or confident like cling to that practice that you you and your body have been on default. For your whole life your mind if when we do not take our thoughts captive. They're just defaulting to something that we don't like and that's what they've done for years and years and years and years and years to so to retrain your thoughts. You're going to have to specifically think them on purpose with intention on repeat. So not only at the top of my calendar I teach this in my mentorship. We write our twelve week breakthrough girls at the top of our calendar every day but we also are writing the thought that we are thinking on purpose the on repeat we are writing it every day we are putting it at the top of our calendar. The top of our mind. So many people. A whole other call and goals that I have a whole nother lesson inside my mentorship that is the the most intrinsic detailed emotional yet strategic way for you to actually accomplish goals within twelve weeks um and being aware of the feelings you need to create in order to to accomplish that goal, but also the thought that you were going to think on purpose is so powerful. Okay, so I know that this is going to be helpful for you and your business no matter what your business is for you and your own life to help you evaluate something you can do this coach and call on yourself. Okay and you could probably have a lot of breakthrough, right? Then and there but I just when I was doing those coaching calls today literally and I did about 6 of them this week. The most powerful thing that happened in every single one of those coaching calls was the question. What are you avoiding or resisting and also the question. Why have you not reached your goal already because that allows them the the space to be honest with their set themselves and we can work with truth the truth is what sets people free not pretending or avoiding or resisting or acting like that is not under an underlying reason of why that's there the truth will set you free. And it takes bravery and honesty and vulnerability and there was ah there was often tears in talking about that that question but that is where the healing happens that is where you can create a different future from your past. So their printout will be in the show notes. So Excited and empowering. This is just like a baby taste within our mentorship. I really do this in real life as I coach people and there's such transformation in coaching and what is unfortunate is so many people are too scared to get coaching or they aren't willing to feel the feeling of like, they're just like oh that feels uncomfortable. But if they would allow themselves to feel the feeling of possibly feeling embarrassed for getting something coached on something that they are they They don't feel strong in but it would make them feel weak or it would make them feel and less than or not good enough or just. Yeah, basically they don't feel strong in that area that is what we can work with that level of vulnerability that level of honest honesty that level of truth is probably what has kept you stuck so blessings to you guys blessings to your breakthrough. Can't wait to visit with you guys next week.

91| I get it, I NEVER want to feel insecure, rejected, embarrassed or insignificant either. The Feelings Wheel is about to become your best friend.

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Hello welcome back to the Prosperity With Purpose Podcast. I am Jessica Hefley and today we're diving into one of my favorite tools. That is the foundation inside of How To Get Off The Hot Mess Express which comes for free with the mentorship. This is just a recorded pre-recorded mini-course that teaches you these things. It's for free when you join the mentorship but with the feelings. We're getting in touch with the feelings- I don't know why I'm saying. That's so weird right now. I am very excited about this because most high achievers miss this and this is why they keep experiencing burnout. They keep their anxiety is so high. They may be achieving in their business or in some area of their life but the other areas feel unfulfilled or feel low or feel lacking and they just don't feel like they have wholeness in all areas of their life, and we all know that when one area of your life improves. It helps improve the other areas as well. So I want to help you be a whole-hearted leader. A leader who genuinely loves what they do who operates for a place of purpose who knows who they are because they will prosper and prosper other people in the making. Okay so get out the little feelings wheel we're going to I'm actually going to give you this one part of the welcome packet that comes with How To Get Off The Hot Mess Express mini-course but just the feelings wheel. Okay I want you to be looking at that I ah here I've um, pulled it up on my YouTube video. It's got all these different feelings and about trust me I'm good. This is all going to make sense in just moment. Mad, scared, joyful, powerful, peaceful, sad and actually you know 20 more emotions from each of those that spread out that are more detailed why we're talking about this in the first place. So over and over and over again I hear people say I coach people in their businesses right? I post in my network marketing business, I post about the income. I post about the business. There's things that I have done to actively work my business that have got me to the top of it and then I'll coach some people and they'll say well that just feels inauthentic to me or I'll you know I'll challenge them to do something and they'll be like that feels inauthentic. I want to be authentic in how I work my business or how I post about my business or how I display myself to the world and I'm here to challenge you on that which is so interesting for you to notice. Okay, let's go through inauthentic. What does that mean. What does that actually feel like where are you feeling inauthentic in your body because when I look at this little feelings wheel. So fascinating- the scared section of the wheel. Ah, most people feel they're I'm curious if they're confusing inauthentic with fear with being scared those are very similar feelings sensations and the body they can be. They're commonly missed diagnosed. It's not the right word but people are saying I don't want to be inauthentic when really, what's probably going on beneath. There are some. Other but more specific feelings which would make sense why you would avoid it like the plague but I'm going to help you process those today on this episode so you no longer avoid things like the plague because leaders are not avoiders to help you actually process this so you can move forward to help you actually identify what's going on. And your thoughts and your heart and your mind and in your body so that you can grow your business so that you can prosper so you can have prosperity with purpose. There's 4 that I want to evaluate or talk about today that may be similar to inauthentic but what probably what possibly it could be is insecure number 1 insecure so interesting. Do you notice that the feelings of insecurity could easily be mistaken with I don't want to be inauthentic. What does insecurity feel like for you? Where is that is that in your stomach? Do you get that like pit in your stomach of like, I don't feel confident in this, I feel scared, I feel like I am an imposter, I feel definitely not bold, not confident that this feels new. This feels uncomfortable this feels like I don't want to do that. Interesting. 1 of the things I teach people is that they are able to feel every feeling and not die. Did you die? Okay so insecure I want you to notice if you are actually feeling the feeling of insecurity and where is that in your body take a couple moments and acknowledge that you're feeling insecure in that way. Don't discredit it or discount it or ignore it. Acknowledge that you're feeling that way and then when you fully acknowledge it then you have a choice you have agency over that you can choose to stay in that feeling. It can be like oh okay, I'm feeling a little insecure about this. But I am able to I can make powerful decisions so my life and business can move forward and then choose in bravery to move forward to make that post to start start that podcast to talk about the business to do that reach out to do that marketing. Okay, you have a choice. You always have a choice but when you are unaware and you're just like oh that doesn't feel and that feels inauthentic I'm going to call ah b s and say well let's explore that because that might be something else. Okay inauthentic is like the noble title to put up. I don't want it to be inauthentic. I am challenging you. To look a little deeper because if you keep staying in this I don't want to feel that feeling then you ain't going to be able to move forward. I mean, internet we bless you in the name of Jesus it keeps pausing so we're gonna keep moving forward. Number 2 rejected is also one of those deeper feelings. That is I miss or confused with being scared or being fearful or being in the inauthentic so rejected. Oh I don't want to feel rejected what does rejected feel like to you does it feel like in your head It feels heavy. It feels. Does it feel in your chest like I don't want to feel rejected and and does it just notice is a possibility that you're feeling rejected instead of inauthentic or fear. Number 3 embarrassed. Where do you feel embarrassed in your body? Literally take a moment when's the last time you truly felt embarrassed where did you feel that in your physical body? What part of your body when you when you're like I'm embarrassed where is that? Does your face maybe turn red and hot? Where does it have a temperature? Does it have a color? Does it have a size? What does embarrassed feel like in your body? Journal that, journal everything that comes up with embarrassed. And then you get to choose to move forward. You get to you have the beautiful gift of acknowledging that you're actually feeling embarrassed. That's actually what's going on and then you get to decide to move your life and make powerful decisions to move your life in your business forward. The fourth insignificant. What if you're actually feeling insignificant? What if you actually make that post and nobody likes it or not very many people comment on it? That might make you feel embarrassed like before or insignificant. What's insignificant? It's different for every person. There's no right or wrong answer. That maybe in your throat. Do you feel like your voice doesn't matter.? Do you feel like what you have to sit people don't care about what you have to say so that makes you feel insignificant which is an uncomfortable feeling. But you don't want to feel that make you make perfect perfect sense. Of course you don't want to do things that are going to make you feel insignificant because that is it could be a very triggering thing of something that's happened in your past however that is your past that may have triggered you. In your past. But now you have the tools and the ability to be in the present with the feeling of insignificant you have a loving father who speaks the truth over your identity that you are incredibly significant. No matter. What. Anybody else says no matter how many likes comments email sign-ins orders. You get the the thought ah of that you are insignificant is a lie and you get to choose if you're going to partner with the truth or you're going to partner with a lie so isn't this fascinating. Just simply deciphering when someone's like I don't want to post about income because I don't want to be inauthentic girl. We're going to challenge you on what is actually happening there behind the layers and then we're going to challenge you to do it in spite of those feelings. I have always taught I have knowledge when I am scared of something that means I have to do it I have I just I may I make myself do it because I am oh self-aware enough to notice. Really don't want to do this. This is going to make me feel uncomfortable. I actually feel scared right now I will take a moment I will feel it in my body I will journal about it and then I know that leaders go first I know that leaders lead the way I know that leaders are pioneers. Let's take that back and say all those things for you I know that you are a pioneer. I Know that you go first I know that you steer the ship I know that you are willing to feel every single feeling on this feelings wheel process that and still choose to move forward because we do not allow these things to stop Us. We did not allow these things to stop us in our tracks we did not allow these things to keep us for more prosperity with purpose if you listen to my money five part money Mindset series that are recorded right? but are the episodes right before this one please check those out because those will radically change how you view yourself, how you view money, but this is bigger than money. It's how you view your every area of your life. This expansiveness, this goodness of God like we have too bottled these things up. We have missed. We have misguided thoughts that are actually selfish about like I don't want to do that. I have enough money. I know I'll mismanage it. I I have enough. Like all of those things are so self-obsessed when we are called to steward and multiply we are called to feed the poor we are called to bring our gifts forth. So here's your homework for today. Are you up for a challenge? Because I like to work with people who are up for a challenge. And prosperity in my mentorship. We challenge each other every week because that's how you make someone better is challenged and that's why I am there to coach them inside of the mentorship because what you're doing isn't working or what you do you're doing has gotten you this far. And that's the whole point of a coach to help you bring help bring up some blind spots for you. They're called blind spots because you don't see them you're blind to them so it's so accelerating your growth to have someone to be able to notice those to ask you the curious questions to help you process. And help you move forward on your own. So here's the feelings. Well this is so fascinating. You can see all the different want here. We go that this next week. Try this for one week well first of all, get How To Get Off The Hot Mess Express and this explains it in way more detail. It's $97 it's prerecorded every single person needs this or jump into the mentorship because this is all provided inside the mentorship for free. You take the feelings wheel for one week I want you 3 times a day. It could be right when you wake up around lunchtime or at night or life's crazy just 3 times a day I want you to pick up the feelings wheel. And I want you to actually be able to identify what you are feeling in that moment and it may be more than one and I just simply want you to write it down and help yourself journal about it process about it because here's the thing most of us are here's the key ones or this is not an exhaustive list. It also can be feelings that are not on this list. But. Kind of there's kind of 6 powerful ones like you're either mad or sad or feeling peaceful and powerful. There's good feelings too powerful or joyful or scared but most people like me before learning this work. You know like because there's like over a hundred feelings on this wheel and I'm like there's a hundred feeling like I thought there was 3 angry sad and happy. Like and my life was pretty surface level because and have the depth of being able to acknowledge these and process these and for me for my personality who tends to get angry about out things you know I get that makes me so angry. It was so easy just to be angry or just to be mad. It took more work to look further than what mad was look deeper so really behind the mad I probably sometimes I was feeling hurt or I was feeling frustrated or I was feeling skeptical or critical or hateful or rage or embarrassed like there was something below the anchor or it's so easy for us to be like well I'm so sad or I'm depressed like really let's what actually is going on. What's a little bit deeper than that are you feeling lonely are you feeling bored? Are you feeling guilty? Are you feeling stupid? Are you feeling inadequate? Are you feeling inferior? Or are you feeling apathetic? Get a little bit deeper, because it's so easy to say you're sad or it's easy to say you're mad or it's easy to say I'm scared or I'm not doing that instead explore a little deeper to find some freedom that's what I'm here for to help be a conduit to break these things off to help you find some freedom to live a wholehearted life. So there you go pretty simple just look at just start notice. So many people are so out of touch with their body like I will ask them coaching questions. It's so fascinating I'm like okay well how does that make you feel and then they'll go and they'll talk for 5 minutes about all their thoughts I'm like. Let's go back to it. Those are all thoughts but how are those thoughts making you feel in your physical body god made our bodies. This is not like woooo weird stuff like this is how god made us so we've got to get back to the body. Get. Back to what we're actually feeling and then we will have with more understanding about why we have been acting certain certain ways or avoiding certain things avoiding certain conversations or avoiding doing things in our business avoiding moving forward. We're upper level living in us limiting ourselves that the list goes on but this is an excellent self-awarenessreness, self- empowerment tool that will give you agency and specific specificity on what’s really going on so 3 times a day check in with the Wheel notice where and it could be more than one at you know every time you check in it give me 1 on top. 1 time. From 1 uncomfortable conversation I had with somebody, processed it and I had 11 different emotions that I was feeling in my body. It was like once I process one it was like oh I'm embarrassed and then like oh wait. No I'm angry. Oh did I do something wrong. It was this beautiful thing and then after I process it I was. It felt so much lighter it wasn't triggering me. It wasn't triggering the anger or triggering the sadness or triggering the fear. It was like oh wait. No this is actually what's going on huh as not a big of his deal as big of a deal as I thought and I am a person of purpose who lives on purpose. So I want to move forward. So we started all of this from the original thought of when people were saying I don't want to be an authentic. Super interesting. I want you go back and to explore those 4 areas could you instead actually be feeling insecure or not wanting to feel rejected embarrassed or insignificant. Super. Super powerful. That's I'm here for I'm here to help you have the breakthroughs y'all we'll see you next time.

90| Expansiveness; How Not Conforming To The World Pays Off.

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Welcome back to the Prosperity with Purpose podcast, I'm Jessica Hefley, and I think we could go on and and on with the Money Mindset series forever. But we're going to leave it part 5 from last week and we're going to go move forward from now on. This will be a little bit about money. So many other episodes in the future because this is Prosperity with Purpose. But today let's talk about expansiveness. Let's talk about some of the things we went through in the last 5 episodes. Go check those out. Start with episode one. I believe it's actual episode like 85 but episode 1 in the Money Mindset period. But it is episode 85. Okay, check that out but put it in the show notes where you can get that started. The second part ,the second one of the series talked about who I don't want to give it away, I want you to go listen to it. Okay I'll give away because I have to help you understand what the context of episode is, so I had you go back and listen to it. It's very powerful. I had y'all put your dream big dream goals like income yearly goals like a big stretch goal and I had you scratch it out and double it and I want to talk about that again for a second because there's something that that does to us if we allow. It's called expansiveness is starting to. Allow the possibility of something bigger than you had imagined before is starting to allow that thought to creep in to think about it to not let it be like so sticker shock. The first time you ever see it but start thinking about hey that actually could be possible for me that amount of income actually could be a really big blessing to those that I love and could help make the world. A better place. Okay, so expansiveness and this whole concept of expansiveness led me to thinking differently again which usually always takes us back to right thinking. Differently So I've been going on daily walk and we have this. We're not in a neighborhood. We're on a bunch of acreage but we're close to a neighborhood So go walk in the neighborhood and there's this really big Hill. Really big long Hill I like to consider call it. My Booty Gains Hill. Watching walking it every day I'm like yeah I'm gonna get some booty gains. That's how it just makes me excited Anyways i' been going every day. It's amazing. What yeah, what will happen in your life when you decide to have to decide ahead of time that you'll do something Anyways, the other day I was like I'm just gonna meditate on this one verse over and over and over in my mind Romans twelve. To do not be conformed to the pattern of the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Okay, so I go on a walk and I'm just thinking about it that Verse I'm saying it out loud I'm allowing mine to think on it and ponder on it even and ah the passion translation I Love how it is worded in there. Says stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you but be inwardly transformed by the holy spirit through a total reformation of how you think renewed renewing your mind completely changed by how you think so I'm going to my walk and I'm just thinking about the scriptures over and over and over again and it's reminding me again that we think differently as followers of Christ. We think differently as leaders we think differently than other people, and so it's just this expansiveness theme and thinking differently calling myself higher. Calling other people higher, call it not just calling myself I've been since I've been in this expansive mode these last couple of weeks I have been calling my team hire I have been calling my friends hire I have been It's like what this is this is the power of growth. This is the power of you joining the prosperity of purpose mentorship because when you work on you. Your thoughts your processes your emotions how you show up how you how you steward your time and your money and your resources how you grow your business like that gives you authority to set other people free in that area is this so interesting. Some people ask me today like my budget on what I spend. On like reinvesting back into my team or gifts or prizes or things like that for my network marketing team and I was like my biggest chunk is investing in me and that's not selfish and I said if you want to 10 x your business. The biggest amount of money you should spend is should be on your own coaching because you will then. Have the agency and authority in those areas to help your team I believe that has been 10 fold sent back to me because of how I have had I have made this a priority to grow to stretch to be uncomfortable to learn to get coaching to ask the uncomfortable questions to put things into play to be able to be uncomfortable, to be able to be embarrassed and asking things that I don't want to ask all of those things have provided breakthroughs that in turn I can now have other people on my team have breakthroughs. It is the best investment. So anyways, thinking differently if we have to think differently, who is challenging you to think differently? How are you daily and weekly investing in thinking differently? So anyway, so my original really big scary goal was $10,000,000 a year. I'm like, “Oh my goodness that just seems so big and hard!”, just different from what just anyways so when I had to cross that out because I do but I do what I tell y'all to do it then became $20,000,000 and it's been really interesting to these last couple weeks allow my brain to be like $20,000,000 so a person who earns $20,000,000 a year. How do they show up? Who and what kind of person is that? What kind of person do they hire on their team to help them? How do they think? How do they show up. How do they give, and it's been really fun to allow your brain to start this, so I'm excited about you guys as you have started to double that and started to just enjoy the possibility of that enjoy expanding your mind around that amount because your body won't go where your mind hasn't already been so even like literally journaling about it like having fun with it all the things that you're going to do with it anyways. So and just focusing on expansiveness and focusing on gratitude the other day. Okay, so recently got a text from a very high up person at our headquarters for the network marketing company that work with Plexus. Anyways, it wasn't any special to you but how she worded it sparked expansiveness in me. She just had mentioned some research and some things that they were going to bring to us at convention and how a legacy leader like me would be really interested in learning about this. What are you really interested in growing this way, and I could have just been like yeah didda du but when she it was like when she called me a Legacy Minded Leader. It was like oh okay, legacy minded leaders make $20,000,000 a year. Legacy Minded Leaders are expansive. Expansive legacy minded leaders think differently than other leaders. It like took me to another level higher of the possibilities and took me another level higher in my identity. So when I was thinking that I'm just a leader you know or top leader I don't know. Oh and she probably doesn't even know this. I’ll tell her that but when she said it legacy minded leader it just it rose me up I'm like I want to be that I want to be a person who learns about this I want to be a person who is the legacy minded leader because that's bigger than just a regular leader that is leaving a legacy. I just found that super interesting the timing of all that of you know that expansiveness that next level of thinking I had just went on a walk. It might have even been that day when I was really, really thinking over and over again. “Do not conform to the pattern in this world. Be transformed by the renewing of your mind” have you ever done that if you've like really chewed on that particular verse? “Do not be conformed to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:2 fun fact in our new house we built a house last year have we have a powder bathroom in the hallway, and I have wallpaper that is all the book of Romans written on wallpaper. I love it in there. It's like my moody bathroom. I've got one wall that's got the Romans all over, but it's behind the mirror I've got like a pretty mirror and then the rest of the wall is like a dark, pretty moody color. But anyway. Okay, so do not be transformed do be not be conformed by the pattern of this world but be transformer renew renewing of your mind I'm going to read it again in the passion translation stop imitating the ideals and opinions of the culture around you. But be inwardly transformed by the holy spirit through a total reformation of how you think how you think it is that important when I talk about it over and over and over again is because it is that important. When you get the $97 “How To Get Off The Hot Mess Express” mini course which every single one of you needs because it is that important it is the layered foundation of what I teach inside of my mentorship teaching you how to take your thoughts captive, teaching you how to understand. Thoughts create feelings which are creating actions or inactions. It is so incredibly powerful and speaking of stop imitating the world and the opinions of the culture around you be okay, y'all this also happened this week. The Lord just lines all these things out that are happening in my own personal life and then I come and talk to you about him on podcasts see what I mean that's what I'm talking. When you get coaching when you are aware of all these things you can then go and teach your people train your people about how the lord is downloading things in your life as you are open to the expansiveness of it anyways. Okay, y'all. Gonna talk about it for a second not because I want to get it give this person any more publicity but this was an example that came to my mind. Okay, so a certain someone who is not a country music. Singer has a big country music singer top hit right now I have avoided. Okay, when that first came out. It's. Beyonce and so the texas hold him zone. Okay, hear me out when the I have I got lots of thoughts and feelings around her but they're not conspiracy theory thoughts and feelings. It would be wise of you to be careful about that song and be careful about her I'm saying it.

She literally says she has an alter ego that something possesses her body and she becomes someone else. Yeah, that's demonic. Sorry I'm laughing because I'm uncomfortable, I feel uncomfortable but you got to be careful.So here's the day when it first came out I went and looked up the lyrics because I'm always like I want to make sure like what is she saying in this like what? What? This is very interesting that she's coming over into the very conservative country music market isn't it anyways. So I went and looked up the lyrics I'm like these don't even make no sense. This isn't what is a song even about. Yeah, it's got a catchy tune. But this doesn't even sense. So I refuse to put it in any of my reels y'all but the other day was just innocently scrolling and so it was in somebody else's reel that I follow and then I went to go take a shower. And I could not stop singing the song and I kept catching myself and I was like, why am I singing the song? Why is it so catchy? And then I started to think what are the other songs in my life that are like popular, popular songs and they're so catchy and you can't stop singing them and then get in your head I'm like y'all go look her and Taylor Swift are like best friends forever. And Taylor Swift is not even hiding it. She literally says she's a witch she literally says she makes songs for witches. We got to be aware of these things whether you like it or not there. It is there. It is. And so in light of that when I was like could not stop singing that song I was like no no no and then I got out to shower and I'm like I have to make a or later on that day I was listening to some sort of worship music and I was noticing a theme around some of them around gratitude I'm like I have to get a playlist out to my listeners. Some worship music on repeat that is about gratitude, and so I'm going to put the playlist down in the show notes for you guys because it's just important for us to renew our mind. It's important for us to catch ourselves on what we do have on repeat repeat repeat repeat and is that the truth. Is that the truth over you is that going to help you in your walk and help you in your journey and propel you forward or just like stall you on repeat singing some stupid song. They don't even make no sense. Okay, so that's what I got for today. So listen to that playlist work on your own awareness and expansiveness around that like a big, huge scary goal of the income and see what the lord does with that see what ideas start spreading like this week for example in Prosperity with Purpose Mentorship I was teaching on hiring, delegating and resting. Most people aren't thinking about hiring and and delegating at a next level. If they want to if they plan to increase their income or even keep their own income they have now. But to delegate and hire is something most people avoid but man when you really grasp that and the reason why and how that. Stimulates the economy and provides a good job for somebody else, but it really also helps you operate in your zone of genius doing the things that only you can do doing the things that god has gifted you with to steward and multiply and letting somebody else take care of all the other things. So. Can't wait to see y'all next week thanks Arere here and don't forget to get and be in the prosperity purpose Facebook group. We've got some fun fun, fun stuff going along in there and thank you! Thank you! Thank you for sharing the podcast. It's an honor. You guys are the best see ya.

85| Money Mindset Series #1: What if it's not good or bad?

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Hello welcome back to the prosperity with purpose podcasts I'm Jessica Heffley and we're starting a money series. Excited and 1 of my favorite topics 1 of the hottest topics. 1 of the most popular topics talk about is money and being a christian and making more of it and talking about all the things that people shy away from but why did they shy away from them. What made it weird who taught them. Ah, talking about money was taboo or wrong or anything all these okay anyways, we're going to start out of the series I want to lay a foundation for you to start thinking about money as neutral money is not good. Money is not. Bad I want you to start noticing that money is neutral. You can think about it. However, you choose it's literally neutral. You think of a I don't have 1 in front of me like a brick like if like a big big like a rock and pretend to have a rock. No, but. Aids here for you guys watching video on Youtube but um, think you have it pretend I have a rock in my hand. A rock is neutral. It's not morally good. It's not morally bad. You can take the rock or this brick that I have in my imaginary brick I have in my hand and you can throw it through someone's window and rob their house and break into their house. You can do that with a brick, or you can take that brick and that can build the foundation of a church or a home or a homeless shelter. You can build something good with that brick. The brick itself is neutral. What you choose to do with it makes it what you can. You can rob somebody or bash somebody's window or you can build the foundation of something to understand, but the rock itself is neutral. So I want us to start thinking about money as neutral, neither good neither bad.

What if we started to take the judgment away around money?

Oh that person bought that car that means nothing oh that person drives that car. Still. Means nothing oh that person lives in a double-wide interesting. Oh that person lives in a mansion interesting. What if it's neutral what if we do not attach a meaning to money you get to choose whatever you want to make it mean. Okay, you you can make a certain amount of money mean whatever you want, for example, $200 could be an incredibly life changing amount for somebody for somebody else $200 who's in like major huge trouble or debt. To them $200000 may not be enough. The amount of money doesn't mean anything. You are the one who gets to choose what you make a certain amount mean, what you make money mean! What are you making a certain number mean? You get to ask yourself - this is important. We're going to lay on this and in the weeks to come but I want you to start noticing how much judgment you currently have around money. Around people who have money. Around people who don't have money. What you are making yourself mean, or your success or your worth because of the amount of money you currently have or the amount of money you currently make? I just want you to notice - I just want you to be a noticer of your thoughts - this is foundational in everything - mindset work. Everything for what I teach in leadership and success. Is you have to start noticing what you are even making things mean. Okay, so I wanted to start out with this because well I always love my own life circumstances. What I'm dealing with what I'm going with what I'm like struggling with wrestling with and I like to bring those to you guys because that shows that well first of all I am normal I am a certified christian life coach but I also still struggle with some mindset stuff. So here's here's what happened recently so recently I was at a retrest - I work for a network marketing company Plexus, and I'm in the top of that company. They had the top 30 come and they did a special retreat to a mastermind retreat. They had Phil Jones come and he spoke to us. It was phenomenal and they did a special gift for us. I might tell you about we got training we got time with our CEO, our President our CFO all of the C-s suites- the chief training officers. The the people who comes out with our products and the marketing . We are partnering with them to bring about the future to work together to row in the same direction. It' a beautiful partnership. Anyways, it's this really special trip. We we went to the The Waldolf Astoria in California and Orange County to this really bougie fancy, nice restaurant. It was gorgeous. But y'all actually flooded in California it was like this noaic flood. They talked about where we were so excited to go to California in February to get sunshine from the drab duriiness we've currently been having in Arkansas and most of the country and we get there and it literally rains the entire time we are there. Pouring! We're on a hill right by the ocean at this resort but California is flooding! All the streets are! One of the worst floods! Anyways, we stayed inside but it still was amazing and wonderful.

Last year at this trip there is supposed to be like a special top 30 trip and so they're new at this. We're new at this. We get to offer suggestions. You know they get to run with it. The gift wasn't exactly like top notch. So this year that we were just like please have it be like something really special and anyway so we walk in the room and there are Louis Vuitton boxes where all of our seats are and there are these beautiful yellow boxes, yellow-orange whatever you call it boxes. You know the label. They've got the fancy Louis Vuitton ribbon around it, everyone is squealing, freaking out, getting pictures taken with it. It already upped the essence of the room and nobody even knew I was inside the box. Nobody had even opened the box yet. I feel so unique in this but we're going get to and just like and nobody had even looked inside but it just the fact that it was a Louis Vuitton box may you know.

Just was a completely different vibe different feeling different experience in last year, so anyways ended up being these beautiful scarves and super fancy stuff. All that stuff so great ,and I am going home and I'm still thinking about it. But I'm still thinking about it because I don't care about Louis Vuitton, but for some people it’s their dream. It was so luxurious. They felt so incredibly special. They've always wanted that and I just literally don't care. The meaning I have attached to Louis Vuitton is different from the meaning they have attached to Louis Vuitton, but I was I was still thinking about it. So if you're ever like still thinking about something and it's this is a surefire sign like if something is making you feel uncomfortable and to me that is always an invitation to explore deeper. There's always an invitation to get the journaling out to get the creation cycles out to use the tools I teach with my students to figure out what I have made something mean, right? And so I got to be real honest. First of all, you can' find healing in breakthrough. It's rare to find healing in breakthrough until you're completely honest with where you are, so I had to get honest on how I judged people who love Louis Vuitton just being honest, the truth isn’t always pretty.

Sometimes like I literally don't care like I did not grow up aspiring to get Louis Vuittons, and it doesn't mean anything to me. It doesn't mean that you're more special or you aren’t. I just don't care, and it's not something that excites me. It's not something that I guess the meaning I have attached to Louis Vuitton is almost unnecessary. But so I was like wait, am I ok with that I know most of the people loved it? I'm so glad they listened. It was a nice treat. A nice treasure. I'm not dissing the gift anyway, I just got really curious about why Louis Vuitton doesn't matter to me. I got to really thinking about it. iFor example I do own one Louis Vuitton never full I did not pay for that house I'm not kidding anything fancy that I own plexus has paid for or is from a shopping spree that I earned or a a contest that I had that they did and I it was It's like super fun I I don't know I just It's just not a core value of mine and that is okay. I have worked with lots of people on my team that they've thought the meaning they have attached to is if “oh if I get to the top of the company then I have to wear Louis Vuitton or I have to dress this certain way or have to act that certain way.”, and it's almost like they feel like they're betraying who they genuinely are. You get to choose. You don't ever have to own a Louis Vuitton. You can own 10 Louis Vuittons. You get to decide what you make that mean. But for me when I was still really wrestling with this. I had to come to grips and I was judging people who loved it . What was I making that mean like they were thinking that was some sort of status or some sort of important made them more important than somebody else or did to do but really no, it doesn't I don't know I like on I just don't like it and that's ok, it's ok for it not to be my thing. It's okay for it to be some other people's thing. Okay, the measure you use will be measured against you so when I was so worried about what other people would think when I'd be wearing this louis baton scarf or the one never full that I ownd because I got it from a Plexus shopping spree that I don't even carry, because I still was worried what people would think about me or think that they would think that's important to me or that's where I would spend all my money or to to when I literally only use it when I travel on Plexus trips because it's literally a never full bag. Have you ever seen how much you could fit to a never full bag? It is a lot. Okay, but all of this went back to what measure you use will be measured against you, and so when I was over there judging , what I was making it mean? What about people who enjoyed that brand or wanted that brand or sought that brand out that in turn the measure you use would be measured against you. I was so worried then about what other people would think about me when I carried that purse or wore that scarf or whatever.

I want you to think about a situation in your life. This may be super dumb and you may not relate to this at all I do believe there's going to be a lot of you that will relate to this but you may not but there is something I want you to get to notice. This is what we're doing this week noticing something in your life that you have judged around money. Maybe someone who has less than you or more than you or what have you made it mean because all of this comes down money has nothing to do with your worth? We don't work from a place to gain our work our worth. We don't work so we'll be worth something or the money! No, we are already worth it. Jesus died for us to make us worthy!

Nothing we do or don't do can make us any anymore any less worthy.

But when you operate out of a place of already knowing your worth You're not working for it. That's a completely beautiful different place of abundance, because you are working from a place of purpose.You are working from a place of, “I know who I am!” “I know who I've been called to serve!” “I know why I am showing up here on social media!” “I am so obsessed with helping the person who needs what I have to offer.” Because I know that that I am worth it I know it that they are worth it. That's also a beautiful thing that you get to do in leadership is you get to rise other people up who do not believe in themselves yet who do not think they are worth. You get to call call life forth in someone else. Anyways I just thought that was super interesting and I've gained a lot since I've wrestled with this or that. I no longer care. I don't care if you carry a Louis Vuitton or not. I'm not making it mean anything about you anymore. I'm not making it mean anything about me anymore. It's a preference good for you or not for you? It doesn't matter. But as long as I was holding onto like making that mean something bad about me or bad about something else. It was this like ick cycle of judgment , and I get to choose. I get to choose what I make something mean. You get to choose what you make money mean. So this week as we build upon as we go on to next week well first of all I want to hear what your stories like what have you some things that you've made mean something that wasn't and you're learning like if you are truly to look at money as being neutral again we're going to build upon this. This is a foundation in this money series. Just start thinking about it as neutral, “Huh,this bill was this much, interesting”, “My house payment is this much, interesting”, “My car payment is this much, interesting”, “My paycheck was this much this month…interesting”. What if you didn't make any of that mean anything about. you? And to kind of piggyback on that a part of all of this we'll get into this in another week but and no matter what how you live your life how you spend your money and what you do for a living. Whatever, I want to I want to introduce this to you be willing to be misunderstood be willing to be misunderstood.I think there's some incredibly important pillars for leadership for leading.

I was doing a training call on Friday, and I was kind of rising them up to a higher level and some of the pillars that I was talking about is leaders steer aspiring leaders and take extreme ownership, and leaders are problem solvers and in all of those areas. You have to be willing to be misunderstood. So as you're learning and gleaning and growing and money and as you're becoming more neutral about what you choose to make it mean other people are still going to choose to make it mean things. So the choices that you make they may judge you. You have to be willing to be misunderstood. Me teach you a little trick, like what it feesl like to be misunderstood. It usually feels like “Oh I don't want people to think that about me, or that's not who I really am” it may make you feel sad or make make you feel grief. It may make you feel angry defensive like whatever that is for you. You get to start noticing. And then you get to take a deep breath. It's okay, if somebody misunderstands you it's part of you moving forward. You don't have time to explain yourself to everybody and you don't have to because the truth sets you free. The truth comes to light in the end. But be okay with being misunderstood and this week start thinking about everything around money as neutral, get curious with yourself - “Huh, why did I react that way? Huh why did I think that way? Why did I judge that person. What am I making this amount mean about me. And come back next week we're going to build upon it and it's going to get better and brighter and juicier and juicier. But for this week look at money as neutral. Have fun. Let me know how it goes!